Thursday, October 4, 2012

Villain of the Day- October 3rd


Ravenna
Okay, I'll be honest, I never got to reviewing this movie, but here's the long and short of it: I can't really decide if I think this movie was really cool or just okay. It had it's good parts, but it also had its weaknesses. One of the good parts, I will say, is Charlize Theron's performance as the evil queen. Most people misjudge her at the beginning because of how hot she is, but then it turns out that she sold her soul for other worldly powers and eternal youth or some crap like that and now she has to suck the life out of younger women in order to keep her youthful appearance. That's pretty awesome. This is one of the parts of the movie that I will say I do like in terms of adding their own spin on a fairy tale. It expands her motivations beyond "I just want to be the hottest in town because, you know, I'm bitchy like that". Being that the movie wasn't all that deep, I can't really say much about her character or her motivations the way I could with the last few, but I still think Charlize Theron's performance is one that is worth noting. The only real problem that I have with it is that we're supposed to believe that Kristen Stewart is going to one day be hotter than Charlize Theron? I'll call BS on that!

Lips red as blood, hair black as night, bring me your heart, my dear, dear Snow White. 

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Villain of the Day- October 2


Enoch "Nucky" Thompson
It should come as no surprise that I'm including someone from Boardwalk Empire, or really anything with Martin Scorsese's name on it. Whether it's Goodfellas or The Departed, Scorsese has done a really good job of creating characters that are badass and evil in their own way. The most recent addition to his little family is Enoch Thompson, the treasurer and mob boss of Atlantic City. Much like Littlefinger, he really knows how to play to people's weaknesses and put on a show. There is an incident where he plays both sides in a racial conflict involving one of his workers. He is the head bootlegger in the city, but he also makes appearances and speaks at temperance rallies. The only person that really knows his angle and whose side he is really on is the audience. And the even more disturbing thing is that the side he is on is his own. He doesn't care who has rights and who doesn't, as long as it ends with money in his pocket, he's okay. He pushes for women to get the right to vote, only because he knows they will vote for the candidate that will serve his interests the best. He sympathizes with African Americans in a racial conflict and a worker's union, only because one of his main men is an African American who is well liked by the community and has a lot of influence in that area. In the end, he doesn't give a rat's ass about anyone but himself.

"The difference between me and him is that I fulfill my promises, and I'm making you one now: I will ruin you, all of you!"

Monday, October 1, 2012

Villain of the day- October 1.5


Petyr Baelish
I was planning on doing several days worth of Game of Thrones villains, but I don't think you guys would care for that all that much. Too much geek in one week. Anyways, one of the other major players in the Game of Thrones is Lord Petyr Baelish, aka Little Finger. In the show (and the books) he is the master of coin, the overseer of the finances in the seven kingdoms. He's basically the treasurer. Remember what I said about every character being flawed, but each having their own likable traits? In Littlefinger's case, it's not so much that you admire him, but rather, you feel for him. He is the prime example of the kid that was bullied and pushed around all his life and finally decided "You know what? Fuck these people" He has a genius level of understanding of people and their weaknesses, which allows him to manipulate and trick everyone into doing his dirty work, whether they know that they are doing it or not. He also has a network of spies which allows him to know your dirtiest secrets before you even know them. And the best part is that you don't really know what his endgame is. You know that he wants to give the finger to all those who sneered at him all his life, you know that he is ultimately looking out for number 1, but to what end? Does he want the iron throne? Does he just want personal satisfaction? Does he want Ned Stark's wife who friend-zoned him for over twenty years? Maybe it's all of them, maybe it's none of them. If you read the books, his motivations, while remaining obscure, do become clearer as the series goes on, and it'll be interesting to see what he ultimately wants in the end. Some people may wonder if I'm going to include Varys, being that he is the same sort of character. He's shady, mysterious, and knows everybody's dirty secrets, but he doesn't really strike me as being all that bad. He may have at the beginning, but right now, I don't really see him like that. But again, given the unpredictable nature of these two men, only time will tell who they are working for, if not themselves.

"Distrusting me was the wisest thing you've done since you climbed off your horse"

Villain of the Day- October 1st


House Lannister

To kick of Villain of the Day here, I figured we'd start off with not one villain, but really a group of villains. And I promise this will be one of the few days where I talk about something Game of Thrones related... I think. Anyway, the Lannisters are one of the most prominent  if not the most prominent families in the seven realms. They consist of Lord Tywin and his children, twins Cersei and Jaime and the youngest Tyrion, but we won't talk about him here because he is a fucking boss and you actually like him. On top of being total douche bags, each in their own way, the Lannisters in general are known just for being some of the most smug ass holes anybody has, or will ever, meet. But why don't we take a look at each of these people and see why they are just so much fun to hate.

Cersei- The wife of King Robert Baratheon and eldest child of her father Tywin, Cersei is the very definition of girl power, she doesn't take no for an answer and fucks up and dick weeds that are stupid enough get in the way of her and her goals... Unfortunately, she is a total backstabbing double crossing bitch that sleeps with everyone, including her own brother and her own cousin. Though, to her credit, she is mostly motivated by her children who she just wants to see want for nothing. In fact, she even at one point hints that her only true devotion is to her children, everybody else can suck it. That's the great thing about this story, is that while everyone is flawed and far from perfect, you can find something to like and admire about most of the characters. I say most because I still don't like Cersei all that much, and there is one guy that I have to talk about that every Thrones fan can agree needs to go away and die!

"When you play the game of thrones, you win or you die. There is no middle ground"

Jaime- The other twin child of Lord Tywin, Jaime is a member of the Kingsguard, a group of knights sworn to protect the king... The last of which he killed years ago. For this, people have a mixed opinion of him. On the one hand, the king was crazy and had to go, and on the other, most people can't look past the fact that Jaime broke the vow he had sworn to uphold by killing the one person he was supposed to protect. In terms of being a villain, I'm really only talking about the first season/book because he has that smug attitude that is almost a trademark of this family, and he shoves a little boy out of a window because he catches him gettin it on with his sister. In the books that follow, he actually turns out to not be that bad of a guy... If you can forgive the shoving a little kid out of a window part.

"There are no men like me. Only me"

Tywin- The patriarch of the family, Lord Tywin has quite a history to him. He had a father who made a fool of himself all the time, he was made Hand of the King to a tyrant when he was twenty years old,  has an utter hatred for the gods because they took his wife and replaced her with a dwarf son, and on top of that, he utterly destroyed one family for insulting him, to the point that the only record of them even being around is a song that was written about them... being totally fucking obliterated by the teenage Lord Tywin. This is a guy who doesn't take no for an answer (see where Cersei gets it from?) and God help you if you even think of telling him "no". In terms of personality, this guy makes Darth Vader look like Santa Clause. He never laughs, hardly smiles and even despised the idea of laughter, mostly because whenever he heard laughter, it was always directed at his father, who made good of every opportunity to make an ass of himself. He's also a "no bullshit" kind of guy. If he sees something, he'll call people out on it and tell them how full of shit they are. Even to his own grandson, the king. Oh, we'll get to that little puke. The one thing that I love about this character is that I love guys who can change the mood of every one in the room, just by walking in the door. There's a scene in the second season where he rides in on his horse and everyone drops what they are doing and bows before him. No other character in the series has really been able to command that kind of respect and fear from people.

"Lions care not for the opinions of the sheep"

Joffrey- There are three things that every fan can agree on. One, there's a character that died at the end of the first season that we are all sad to see go. Two, Tyrion is the man. Three, this little turd monkey needs to die already! He is the teenage son of Robert Baratheon (in actuality, he is the fruit of Jaime and Cersei's incest), and there is nothing likable about him. His entitlement  the fact that he doesn't know how to rule a kingdom, he doesn't know how to earn people's respect, he thinks that he can just throw the word "king" out there and everybody has to like him. He makes Draco Malfoy look like a decent person. Whenever things don't go his way, he orders their heads on a pike and accuses everyone of being traitors. Probably one of my favorite scenes in the series is when Tyrion, being the boss that he is, full on bitch slaps Joffrey because his rage started a riot in the capitol city, and pointing out that his people are starving as a result of a war that he started. Joffrey, go die in a ditch. Tyrion, in the words of the Joker "You are my number one guy!"

"A king does not ask, he commands!"